I was born on January, 18, 1872 in Monte Carlo to Adele and Jean-Baptiste Gautier. Father owned the local bistro where we lived, and was a quiet, but well-liked man. His popularity made the bistro very popular, and even a destination for tourists. Our family wasn't wealthy, but we had a comfortable home. Mother made up for Father's quiet nature with her outspoken flair. She painted and had long dreamed of being an artiste. I was born 2 years after my older sister, Lucette. My childhood years were happy ones. I spent hours peeking over the edges of the cooking pots in the bistro kitchen.

When I was little I loved to dance. When Father would pick up the chairs in the bistro in the evenings to sweep, I would dance across the old wood floors. Some of the neighbors who would stay at their tables until late in the evening would watch me and clap. Lucette would play the piano for me. She wasn’t bad at playing, but in my opinion didn’t have the commitment or the focus to be really excellent. Mother was determined to have one of her children be artistic, so she had been putting aside money for me to take dance classes. I couldn't wait. One night, I when I was 8, I was performing a little piece I had choreographed in the bistro, and in the middle of it, Lucette decided to start singing a little song she had come up with to go with the piano. The audience started applauding and Lucette decided to stand up and claim the stage for herself. She hasn’t given it up since. I never got my ballet lessons; Mother decided her funds were better spent on Lucette's budding singing career. For a long time I would still dance alone in my room hoping someone would wander in and see how wonderful I was and allow me to take lessons again. It never happened. Eventually I stopped dancing altogether.

I attended primary and secondary school in Monte Carlo. Lucette started with me, but barely made it through five years. Even at a young age, Lucette was thoroughly amused when the boys started chasing her tail, and had even more fun when she could chase them. I was the more bookish of the two of us, and by far the more intelligent. I took comfort in my studies, but my mother didn't seem to notice with all of the attention Lucette required. I was always closer to my father, but he rarely got a word in edgewise with my mother around. Fairly early on I figured out it was my job to keep her in check, seeing as she had little judgment of her own. When we went to finishing school I was constantly covering up for Lucette's frequent misdemeanors, knowing it would break my father's heart to know what she was up to.

The biggest rift in my relationship with Lucette happened when I was 15. While Lucette was singing, Mother would often send me down to the open-air market to bring back groceries for the bistro. It was during those excursions that I developed an appreciation for food. It was also during those trips to the market that I met Philippe. Philippe was the son of a prominent captain of one the ships that found port in Monte Carlo, and who’s father was an old acquaintance of my mother’s. He would accompany me on my trips to the market when the ship’s cook needed new groceries. He was the kindest boy I’d ever met, one of the only boys I’d ever met, and we would walk and talk about food for hours. Although he was a few years older than I was, he showed no interest in Lucette or her singing, which I found to be one of his most attractive qualities. Or at least it used to be. Lucette was suspicious when my trips to the market lasted longer and longer (Philippe and I had found a wonderful new cheese stand), and demanded to come with me. Before I knew it, Philippe wasn’t coming to the market anymore. His cook informed me he was going on walks with Miss Lucette. Lucette came home that night and said that she was in love, yes, with Philippe. The only boy I had ever liked now belonged to my sister. And after that I decided it wasn’t worth it to be in love if Lucette would just ruin it every time. Why even try? Lucette will claim she loved him. This is a lie. I doubt that Lucette actually knows what love is. Infatuation, yes. Seduction, yes. Love, absolutely not. You have to have a certain selflessness to be in love which my sister does not possess now, and certainly did not possess when she was 18. She enjoyed having Philippe as possession, an acquisition, but she did not love him the way I did.

When Lucette was 20, she announced she was leaving the family and going to Paris to sing in nightclubs. She was also pregnant. A hormonal, demanding, pregnant Lucette meant a miserable and oppressed Marceline. My mother tried to convince her to stay in Monte Carlo, but as per usual Lucette had to make a dramatic exit. Mother was devastated and told me to go with her to look after her. The idea of living in Paris was alluring, but the idea of living with Lucette was dreadful. But Father encouraged it, and Lucette thought it’d be fun to bring me with her (not as a friend, but as a maid I later found), so she begged me to come. I hate it when Lucette begs. I can’t stand it. She’s done it since she was little. She just whines until I can’t take it anymore. She orders me around so much that when she actually admits that she needs me around I can’t help but stay. Also, I’m the only one that can deal with Lucette when she gets in one of her moods. I’m the only person that she’ll listen to, so I feel guilty trying to leave because I have no idea what would happen to her. Plus, I really have nowhere to go. Living in Paris under Lucette’s thumb is better than not living in Paris at all. There’s at least that maybe one day someone will come sweep me off my feet and I’ll get out of here. A girl can dream at least, and I have plenty of time to imagine my perfect man. He’ll be strong, and sensual, and refined, not like any of Lucette’s men, and he’ll be more handsome than any one she’s ever had too. He doesn’t need to talk much, Lucette does enough of that, but he will absolutely sweep me off my feet. He’ll be intelligent, and maybe he’ll even speak to me in another language, how romantic. And most importantly, he’ll have NO interest in Lucette. He’ll think she’s just as ridiculous as I do. And we’d run away together, away from my sister and this silly apartment, and we’d go to the ballet, and he’ll bring me boxes of chocolates and cakes, and he’ll be an excellent kisser, and I’ll brag to Lucette about it all the time, and…as I’ve said I’ve had plenty of time to dream all this up.

Since I’ve been in Paris, I’ve started eating. Constantly. I just can’t help it. Lucette will go off with some obscure gentleman, or even worse, bring one in, and I’m left to my own devices. And I just get so…frustrated, and angry, and a little depressed, so I eat. I have found that chocolate and patisseries will never disappoint me. I’m 22, living in Paris of all places, and there’s no way I’ll ever be engaged with Lucette as my sister; everyone else tends to fade into the background. Lucette has suitors lined up out the door and can pick whichever one she likes, but it never even crosses her mind to share one with me. But oh well, food never fails me. I’ve become an excellent cook…even though I don’t have anyone to share my cooking with… I have Firmin at least. The two of us together have to deal with Lucette, so the enemy of my enemy is my friend. Although he occasionally tries to correct what I've been told is my unladylike behavior, he will bring me food when he sees I'm really upset.

Lucette will tell you I am jealous of her. This is a complete lie. I do not want to be who my sister is. She puts on a front of being happy, but I doubt she is really fulfilled. I do wish I received the attention she gets, which is why I will occasionally try to repeat what she does, but it is in no way an attempt to emulate her as a person. Ick. She will also tell you I am prone to mood swings. Lies! Hello?! That coming from the drama queen herself. I am the equalizer here. When Lucette has problems she puts them off on someone else. And don't get me wrong, I do love Lucette, she is my sister, but I can't live this way forever. My rebellion is a silent one thus far, maybe not getting her a glass of water once a week, or daydreaming and pretending to listen while she talks to me. I'll escape. I just haven't figured out how yet.

During Act One and through Part of Act Two My center of gravity is definitely much higher. There is something so eager about Marceline because she wants to be noticed and appreciated so badly, which I think causes her to really lead from almost her forehead, which leaves little control over her lower body, which makes her a little clumsy. That certain of gravity really starts to shift when she confronts Lucette in Act Two, and is complete by the time she wins Antonio in Act Three, at which point she totally leads from her hips.

So what I have been able to figure about this is that she punches words a lot in almost that little kid way, which gives her that stop go rhythm, which I think is kinda the same way she moves. I'm thinking of making her sound a bit higher or more nasaly. Working on that next.


Lucette: See givens. This is long and complicated. I want her approval desperately, but I want to come into my own even more.
Cheneviette: I first got to know Cheneviette as the man who got my sister pregnant. Great introduction. He also contributed to those first few miserable months in Paris when Lucette was pregnant and I was nothing more than an unpaid laborer. Being in a house with the two of them was a little scarring. But he gets bored, and once the baby was born and Lucette had broken it off, and he was still around all the time because of the baby, I became a fun distraction for him. He teases me unrelentingly, but I don't mind a little attention from someone. We have a kind of twisted sibling relationship almost. What is it about Chenneviette that is like a brother? What do you two do together (make fun of Lucette, her friends, Fernand, Firmin, the food, the decore, etc.) That is one idea. You two should come up with interior (and sometimes exterior) dialogue. You need an improvisation.
Firmin: We get along quite well. We're a team. I don't do much to bother him, whereas my sister does, so he doesn't seem to mind me much. We play little games when Lucette isn't paying attention. He occasionally tries to promote lady-like behavior, but he'll bring me food if I really need it. You are starting to develop something more interesting that this. Talk with Barrett
Bois D'Enghien: I really don't care for him much. He causes nothing but trouble and chaos both when he's around and even more so when he leaves. I have to pick up the pieces. He barely gives me the time of day, and if he does talk to me, he treats me like I'm five. My sister says she loves him so I try to put up with him, but I'd be glad to be rid of him. Don't you have a mad crush on him? This gives us the opportunity to see why she is still single. Ok, maybe I do. That makes sense.
Fontanet: I do like Fontanet very much because he is kind to me and will talk to me and is always so courteous. His breath is so very unfortunate, but I try my best not to let him know how bad it is. I want to see how much you still like him.
Nini: Nini drives me crazy. She's younger than I am, and she has more lovers than I do, and does not stop talking about herself. Not much to recommend herself. At least I know I'm smarter.
Bouzin: I don't really interact much with him, because when I try to get introduced I get pushed away by both him and my sister. And he pays no attention to me. Humph.
The General: I think he is so incredibly exciting. If only Lucette would actually choose someone like him. He can be a bit scary sometimes though. But he gave me chocolate so it doesn't matter. Again we get to see her as a flirt.
Antonio: In all the excitement of the General talking to me at the nightclub I didn't get much chance to notice Antonio, but when the pair showed up at the apartment I was transfixed. No one had ever handed me flowers before, much less picked me up! He seemed to fit almost perfectly that ideal man I had dreamt up. And even better, his employer was after Lucette so he had no interest. And did I mention he picked me up?? When I snuck back into the room, half to find him and half to figure out what was going on my feelings were confirmed. We ended up nose to nose, and he kept me safe from the General and was so very gallant. And especially when Lucette thinks I'll never get a lover, I have to prove it to her and to myself. Antonio didn't have a chance of getting a way once I decided I was going to get him.
Viviane: She seems very sweet. I don't get to talk to her much, but I hope she ends up happily.
Mme. Duverger: I'm intimidated by her until she calls me a maid. Then I am just sick of being trampled on and I will by all means defend myself. But try to be as pleasant as possible. Show them all you know how to behave in proper society. Then let all the anger out on your sister.

Act 1:
Moment Before:
I woke up early because I was starving, and got dressed as quickly as I could, so that I would be ready for breakfast as soon as it was served. Lucette wasn't awake yet. I tried read and distract myself, but 5 hours after I woke up Lucette still isn't awake, and as hard as I'm trying to behave and not complain I just can't deal with my hunger anymore, so I start begging Firmin.
Moment After/Moment Before:
We finally go into lunch, and I try to be ladylike but I end up having thirds because I'm starving. I eat as much as I can before Lucette comes in so she doesn't see. However after dessert she reprimands me for having more cake than any of our guests. Firmin keeps coming in announcing that all these people have come, and it sounds very silly and entertaining. So when we enter again I'm still content because I'm full, but I'm trying to appease her and prove I can be a lady again at least for a little while.
Moment After/Moment Before:
B d'E unceremoniously moves me out into the dining room, and dessert is still one the table. I try very hard to resist having anything, but Lucette just got this beautiful ring, and another admirer, and I'm upset, so I sneak another piece of cake. So I come back in feeling a little better after the cake.
Moment After/Moment Before:
Antonio carries me out, puts me down, gives me this look and then bows. I am enchanted. I really want to go back into that room. I really really want to go back into the room. I want to figure out what's going on with the General, and I want to be as close to Antonio as possible.
Moment After/Moment Before:
Antonio rushes me out to protect me, and I'm in a total swoon. I go to the kitchen and tell Firmin about everything. He gives me a strawberry. I see Lucette come out, and I really want to go back in the room with her so I'm on my best behavior and must not let her see how entranced I am with Antonio.
Moment After:
Everyone finally leaves, and Lucette wants to sit and talk about everything that's happened to her, but I don't mind so much because finally something is happening to me. She has been a snappy at me but I'm trying to do my best behave because I'll do anything I can to see Antonio again. I help Firmin get tea ready. I do love afternoon tea.
End Act 1.

Act 2
Moment Before:
We are in the carriage on the way over, and Lucette has been grumpy. She's making me carry everything for her and is treating me like a servant, and I'm trying very hard to be good, but it's getting harder and harder. Finally something exciting is happening with me and she hasn't even noticed or tried to congratulate or even listen to me. I always take the brunt of things when she's grumpy. I accidentally dropped something getting out of the carriage and Lucette yelled at me, so I'm a little upset.
Moment After/Moment Before:
I leave with Lucette to look at the "draft" but I'm feeling vindictive. That was a challenge. I will get myself a lover. I just have to figure out how to do it. I don't feel the need to talk much on this excursion because I'm plotting. When I come back in, Lucette gets picked up and carried off, and I wasn't paying attention, so I get very confused and I'm still upset, so I really just want to get out of there, and I want to talk to Firmin so I follow them.
Moment After/Moment Before:
Lucette and Cheneviette are talking very loudly and it's really getting embarrassing, and I wish they would all just be quiet. We're in this nice house, and they're the one's not behaving. I'm trying to find food during this and I happen upon some cookies, which I manage to sneak a few of. When we go back in I just want to know what's going on, because I want to be treated like an equal which no one is doing, but Cheneviette tries to keep me out.
Moment After/Moment Before:
I leave Lucette, and Antonio offers his hand to walk me out. I had been so distracted by Lucette's condition, that I'm caught quite by surprise, but am very happy. He walks me out into the hall. We are able to talk on our own for a few moments, and he offers to find some food for the two of us because he realizes I haven't had dinner. It was very sweet of him.

To be continued…I've finished as much as we've blocked, but I'm not exactly sure when I'm entering/exiting for the end of Act 2 and Act 3, so once I figure that out I will add them in.

Life of the Character 2:
My object is an old wornout copy of Sense and Sensibility, which is my favorite book. I picked it up at the little neighborhood bookstore when I was out buying bread (and pastries, and berries, and chocolate, and a croque monsieur). I love the book and read it all the time because it's about one girl who feels like she can't express her emotions because her sister feels the need to express all of hers. However, the silently suffering character wins her dream husband in the end. Write out your favorite section. My favorite scene is when Edward is finally released from his engagement and comes back for Elinor. It is simple, and sweet, and not much is said, but they finally become engaged after so much difficulty and everything is just as is should be. Another scene that I always appreciate is where Elinor finally tells Marianne how upset she has been even though she hasn't shown it. Elinor is so strong, I like her. One of my favorite quotes: "His heart was now open to Elinor, all it's weaknesses, all it's errors confessed…" Great. Now you know how you will start her diary. I would get a hardback copy of the book and start to work with it in rehearsal. Make a book mark (you will need to do a bit of research) and mark that section. We will work it into rehearsal.

A Day In the Life:

Every morning I wake up usually around 6. This gives me time to dress and greet Firmin before Lucette gets up and I have to help her get ready for the day. Then we finally have breakfast. After breakfast sometimes I go out to pick up a few groceries, or if there's something else Lucette needs…I also usually get myself a treat on the way back. When I get back I like to help Firmin get ready for lunch. I love to be around when cooking is going on, but Firmin often tells me this isn't proper, and then I have to go wait. If I have to wait long I start to read or I just listen to Lucette talk because she is inevitably talking about something. After lunch I try to get out of the house if Lucette doesn't need my attention. I love to walk around Paris. It is so different from Monte Carlo. I like to watch all the different people go by and wonder where they are going. I especially love when i get to hear music in the parks or on the street. It reminds me of dancing. I usually have to hurry back because Lucette takes forever to get ready for her evening and she always needs my help. We often have company for dinner if we haven't for lunch, and then after dinner we go off to the club where Lucette sings. I am her extra pair of hands offstage. I keep going hoping that I might see some handsome gentleman from afar.

This day is very different mainly for 2 reasons: Bois d'Enghien has come back, and that is sure to cause some problem. Secondly, this general has shown up and he has a very attractive interpreter with him who actually seems to be paying attention to me! Oh, and my sister and I fight, and I stand up to her which I rarely do. That moment is pivotal in my coming into my own.

This is a really lovely start; it lacks some essential research. What were markets like? What was Paris like? Where do you live? Where do you walk? Where do you hear the music? What kind of music? Where are the nightclubs located? What kind of people dine? Has that been changing? What makes you stand up to your sister (thing about what happens to you in the coarse of the first scene)? What was everyday like? For example, did you brush your teeth and wash your face this morning? How?


Lucette and I live at 37 Rue Saint Augustin in the 2ème arrondissement. We are about 5 blocks from the Jardin des Tuilleries and about 2 from the Opera. I walk to the Tuilleries everyday when I go out. I like to sit on the black metal park benches and watch as the world walks pass. The Tuilleries provide plenty of space to walk around, but on days when i especially want to get out I walk up the Champs Elysées towards the Arc de Triomphe, or across the Jardin to the . The people watching really is fabulous. Perfect for fantasizing and daydreaming. I also love to walk towards the Opera. Some days you can hear the orchestra practicing from outside. I rarely ever get to actually see an opera, but I love listening to them rehearse. My favorite opera is La Fille du Régiment.

I would describe the people who come to dine as Lucette-o-philes. They're an eclectic bunch. No one of incredibly high status, except perhaps Fontanet. Most of them are probably, almost well to do, but not quite. They still find amusement in nightclubs instead of perhaps the opera or the theater. Cheneviette is around a lot. We have a lot of Lucettes…acquaintances over. We have people like Nini, who we know, but Lucette still feels inferior to. I suppose what has been changing is that she has seemed especially attached to B d'E, and this has kind of upset everything. Now that he's back, everything has gone into hyperdrive. The seduction, the flirting, the toying with people, the ordering me around. She had really needed me when she was upset and now that he's back she treats me like I'm worthless again. I think that harsh turn around has really got to me. What has also changed is Antonio. He showed up, and I have a mad crush on someone for the first time in years, and Lucette doesn't even notice. She laughs at me. I finally feel like I'm really doing something right, and Lucette treats me worse than ever. When I get called her maid, I realize that's it. I need to prove to both her and to myself that I have power over myself and over a man.

By 1890, urban living spaces would likely have had bathrooms, and toothbrushes were mass produced, so I would brush my teeth in the mornings. I'm assuming I would wash my face in a wash basin in my bedroom. It would also take me a long time to do my hair (using a curling iron to set the chignons, and putting it up on top of the head). I would most likely have needed the help of a maid for dressing (the corsets) and for hair, but I would imagine that we maybe don't employ this person full time? Or if we do we pay her very little, and she never comes out when we have company. You and Lucette have to solve this problem. Maybe you have an all around servant: ladies maid and housekeeper and Firmin is the butler and the cook. Talk with Siri.

Eating would also have been terrible for me at formal meals because the gentleman who escorted you in is supposed to fill your plate for you if it is from a buffet line, so it would be very difficult for me if I was really hungry and someone like Fontanet had escorted me in (which he does). It was also impolite to get seconds, because everyone had to wait for the entire group to finish a course before moving to the next course. I think this is why I need to sneak food after we re-enter from lunch, because I didn't want to embarrass myself in front of Fontanet, so I needed to sneak food because I'm still starving. This is such a wonderful problem! Write out what happens at the Act One luncheon.

Reassessing Choices:
After our first full run through, I was feeling like Marceline wasn't really going anywhere, especially in the first act. I decided that I needed to move a little bit away from just plain spazzy. I've been trying to focus on what she's like as a person on her own without Lucette, because I think Marceline is really very smart. She just has never had a chance to test that intelligence in real world situations, which is why she's so awkward. She certainly hasnt had very good role models.
So in yesterday's run through I tried to incorporate that a little more, especially in the first scenes. It was partially effective, because I think it gave me a little more purpose. I still need to be slower and more deliberate though. I also need to find a better way of communicating hunger, because I know that needs to be what drives the scene, but I haven't really made that happen, so that is specifically what I'm going to focus on tomorrow.
Also I think I need to be willing to have Marceline look ridiculous sometimes. Especially in Act 2 when she's trying so hard to act grown up and ladylike and seductive all at the same time and just fails miserably. I have to go through and look at the moments when she's just a complete mess.
I also want to really focus on her arch/transformation. I think I've been doing alright with this, but I want it to be really clear when she comes on in Act 3, that she really has come out of her shell.

My glasses-I keep them on for Act 1 and 2 except when I take them off when the General comes in and leave them on stage when I get carried out so I have to come back and get them. I am nearsighted, so I take them off to read.
My book-I have it with me at the top of the show, and carry it around with me until lunch time, at which point I leave it off left. It is my favorite favorite book (see previous description).
The carpet bag-Set off left, bring it on, leave it on the table. I'm always carrying Lucette's stuff.

Act 1: My brown dress, something normal I would wear, nothing to extravagant to distract from Lucette
Act 2: Grey dress, same as Act 1
Act 3: Green dress, this is a dress Papa sent me for my birthday, but that Lucette forbid me to wear. I finally pull it out when I go to get Antonio.

How you achieved the goal that you set for yourself and what you learned from that goal
• How each dress/performance was different
• How the audience affected you and your choices
• How you will use that information

In this rehearsal Barrett and I tried doing something different for the top of the show because we realized it wasn't working and we wanted to establish our relationship for the audience. What we tried didn't quite work either, but it did lead us to figure something that worked better in class. Having that starting spot makes Marceline's arc easier.
In this rehearsal I got the note of sitting on the ground during my scene with Chenneviette. That scene still went pretty well I think.
Alex and I fixed the mints beat for this rehearsal, yay!
Those were my major notes.

The first scene was better, but it still needs a little improvement because we were anticipating it. Also I stumbled a bit over wording, which got us a bit off. We established the chess much better. We worked on this in class and now we know this is really a matter of timing and energy and not starting too whiney. Marceline has a chance to have the stage to herself for a moment without her sister there so she must make the most of it. She should be as big as possible. So this scene is really the big one I'm working on for tomorrow. I want the audience to really like Marceline and be on her side because she's such a quirkball but I think she's one of the characters who is purest of heart in this show and should really attract their sympathy and support.
One of my notes was that I need to observe Chevy's chess move, which I did, but at the wrong time, so now we have figured out when the right time is and that is a great opportunity for her character and to show the relationship between the two of them.
The general scene went really well. This scene is fun. Alex and I have been connecting on my motivation to get into the room, which is my glasses. I have to make sure the moment when I can actually see him for the first time is really clear. Just have to make sure I dont rip the dress tomorrow.
I think Act 2 went pretty well. I have to make sure I can make my asides heard over the other lines going on. I think when Marceline finally explodes is working well. My goal is to really have the audience on my side at that point. After that fight I've been working to show those places in Act 2 when she's playing with changing how she moves and acts so that its a progression to Act 3.
For tomorrow we have also decided to add a cookie when I enter and get thrown in. I will practice the spin with the cookie with Nate tomorrow.
Act 3 went pretty well for me I think. By that point I think her arc is really clear, and she really comes out victorious.
Opening night tomorrow, l plan to focus especially on energy and timing. Bringing it home!!

Dear Diary,

I doubt that I can adequately describe the extent of chaos that transpired today. It has been truly overwhelming. The morning began in frustration; I woke up early, and Lucette was still in bed at quarter past noon, I assumed it had something to do with her depression over Bois d'Enghien, which is in my opinion was excessive at this point. Firmin had already beaten me at three games of chess, which I have been trying to learn recently, and I was terribly hungry, and I decided it was time to make a racket to get my dear sister out of bed so we could all eat.

She finally did get out of bed only to announce that Fernand had come back! I could hardly believe it seeing as he had seemed so eager to be out of contact in recent weeks. But he was indeed back, and in her bedroom none the less!! My sister's lack of propriety is quite astonishing sometimes. I didn't really know how I felt about his return. On the one hand, I thought, perhaps Lucette will stop weeping and pouting all the time and some sort of order will return and we can do things like eat in a timely fashion. However, having her and Fernand around together does make me quite uncomfortable, and I am neglected all together once again.

Soon after that Chenneviette arrived in his usual casual manner and began to pester me while I was trying to read and stay composed. He seemed to be of the opinion that Fernand was very bad news for Lucette no matter how much in love with him she was. His argument was very convincing. He said that he had hoped the General would be able to visit Lucette. The General is terribly charming. I have never had a man feed me chocolates. So foreign and exotic and handsome. And he paid attention to me. If only we could have someone like him in the house. It would be such a lovely change from the men she usually brings home.

Then Nini showed up. I simply can't stand Nini most of the time. She is terribly unintelligent yet there is something about her that men seem to like. I simply do not understand it. She is incredibly annoying. She told us, without any trace of modesty, that she was engaged, and to a Duke no less!! I cannot stand her. A duke? and Nini? How is it possibly that Nini is engaged, and I, well I haven't got anything, not so much as a look from a man?! It was devastating. Thank goodness she left before lunch.

Monsieur de Fontanet joined us for lunch. He really is such a dear man, and it really is such a shame that he has such terrible breath because he is very kind to me and is never rude. He always includes me in conversations, and escorts me into lunch. Today he even spun me around. His breath is so very terrible though. I wish someone could tell him and maybe he could make it better, but it would crush the poor man.

While we were eating, a composer showed up and was plying this ridiculous music that we could hear in the dining room. Apparently he had written a song for Lucette. Lucette was also asked to sing at a party in a very well to do household. After lunch Lucette found a ring in the flowers from Monsieur Bouzin!! I wish someone would leave me flowers and a ring. But I had cookie so I tried to stay composed.

Then something very exciting happened. The door bell rang and I went to see who it was and it was the General!! He came in and kissed my hand and for the first time in my life I was given flowers. I was overcome, they were beautiful. Then Lucette told me I had to leave, and the General's enterpretor picked me up and carried me off!!! I never seen anything like this happen before, I was caught completely off guard. He took me out of the room, did a little bow and went back. I knew I had to get back into that room. I had also left my glasses, and I needed them back in addition to seeing what was going on. I crept back in and only Antonio saw me, I couldnt see him because my glasses weren't on, but I was very intrigued. I finally managed to steal them back and get a good look. He was incredibly handsome, and I believe I feel in love. Lucette threw him onto the settee that I was hiding under and suddenly his face was right next to mine. I've never been that close to a man before except Firmin and Chenneviette. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't help but keep looking at him. eventually he even saved me and got me out of the room when the General got scary. He's such a gentleman.

In the evening we left for the Duverger party. Lucette would not stop talking in the car. I mentioned Antonio once and she began yelling at me and telling me I was not allowed to talk at the party. I accidentally dropped something getting out of the car and she said I was worthless. I did my best to keep it together as we went in. But when Madame called me Lucette's maid, I couldn't help it. I stayed composed in front of Madame but I was finally done with Lucette treating me like this. Finally something good was happening for me and she wouldn't even listen or support me. She basically said it was unimportant and I was unimportant. So I yelled at her, for the first time ever. And I challenged her, I told her I would get a lover which I then realized I would have to do to save any bit of dignity. It was on.

Then we found Fernand in a closest. What idiot hides in a closest?? He was acting very strangely and I was done dealing with him. He kept wanting to see the silly signing. I was distracted though. I decided that now that I had Antonio's attention I was going to keep it, and I would indeed get myself a lover. We got closer and closer all evening. Then we found out that Fernand was Mmme Viviane's fiance and Lucette fainted. I discovered she was faking of course, just like her. Just when I decided I was done with Lucette, Antonio came and took my hand and carried me off!!! Once out of the room he began talking to me and told me about his country and asked about me and said that he did not approve of Lucette's behavior. He did not say too much but what he did say he said with such eloquence and purpose and looked me in the eye. I melted. We heard noise from the other room, and he took my hand and escorted me in.

Once again, Lucette had done something idiotic and she and Fernand were in their underwear. I can only imagine what she was plotting. I don't even know how to describe her sometimes. Then the General told Bois that he wanted to kill him. Not that I much care, I plan on ending my association with him.

Of course, Lucette did not end up singing. We were told to leave and she did so gladly. She tried to talk to me about everything she had "accomplished" that day, but I got up and left the room and retired for the evening without saying anything to her. She won't control me anymore. I think she was disconcerted by this.

The question now is what to do next. Antonio said he wished to see me again, and the only way I can find him is if I know where the General will be and the only place I know that they are going is to challenge Fernand. Therefore I must find a way of getting there without Lucette noticing. I will take the green dress that Papa gave me and all the jewelry Lucette told me I wasn't allowed to wear. I'm a grown woman, and I will get myself a lover if I so choose. And I do so choose.

I thought that we had a great opening night. My goal was really to pull it all together and keep it sharp.
We were a little shaky in the beginning, I think partially because of the various settee issues. I was however pretty proud that Barrett and Nate and I could keep going onstage without letting that trip us up. That was good. I also thought that first scene went much better than it had been going in rehearsals, which I was pleased about. Again, I think we were kind of finding our footing in Act 1, so we were not quite as sharp, but I think we had good energy. The audience seemed to react well to Marceline, which made me really happy. I think people were noticing the detailing that I had put in, so it was good to get responses about that. I was also very proud that I only broke a little bit when that couch broke, and it was about as well covered as it could be. Alex and I managed to keep it together. Yay teamwork!
Act 2 we really picked it up, I thought it was really clean, and the energy was great, and that carried us into Act 3. I think Marceline's arc has become really clear in the work I've done this week, and I really worked to find those places in Act 2 where she's playing with changing how she moves and acts and speaks which leads into Act 3.
In Act 3 we got some great responses from the audience to the Antonio-Marceline love story, that was great. Act 3 was pretty clean too.

Goal: Sharpen act 1, keep the energy up
I think Act 1 was sharper than it was last night. We didn't have technical issues to deal with, so we were able to focus a little more. The energy dipped in a couple places, so I think for 10/7 Act 1 pace will be really important. The settee didn't break!! and the audience loves that scene, so it's great to get a response and know that you're on track. We had a great audience.
Again, Act 2 and 3 I felt had great energy and were really clean. I felt like I was fairly precise in my transformation, and in general for those 2 acts. Siri and I are connecting well during our fight. Alex and I are connecting better. Lots of energy, woo!

Ahhh final show!!! goals: THE ENERGY MUST NEVER DROP. ever. Push act 1 through.

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